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Milk has 300 reviews on Amazon Groceries
A sample:
Do you know how many baby cows have to die for one gallon of this devil's syrup? I don't either but I bet it is a lot.
And another:
I bought this milk and had it shipped around the world and then back to my home and it was still glowing like the Ark of the Covenant. Why? Luceferites? NO. Science can't explain. If the Earth was made of 2/3 milk we would control the entire galaxy from here to Claxxon 420B in the Gamma quadrant. Don't know where that is? You would if milk were president instead of G. W. But they don't want you to know!

I emptied out the water from my fishtank inhabited by five guppies and replaced it with milk. Two days later I had three sharks, a pony and a used car salesman in there. Evolution? Heck no. Lactofusion!

Buy this milk, inject it directly into your veins and you will be able to melt the faces of any enemy you encounter for the rest of your life. If you don't believe me I will challenge you to a fist fight and punch your soul out of your head and back into your mother's womb!